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What About Camille

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While many have expressed both concerns and disgust about Bill Cosby in the wake of the recent allegations of his drugging and sexually abusing young women years ago, my heart goes out to Camille Cosby, his wife of 50 years.

I can only imagine what her life may be like during these very dark days. At a time when her season should be blooming with flowers, she has to endure the harsh realities of being the wife of a celebrity at its worse.  Not only is she publicly dealing with the effects of a spouse that has been unfaithful, she has to somehow keep her family together and wear a smile even when her heart is aching.

Camille Cosby has issued a statement in support of her husband speaking to his love, kindness, gentleness and that he is a good husband. She further stated, “He is the man you thought you knew.” I am not one to challenge a wife’s relationship with her husband and I take her statement to be based on her relationship and not public opinion.

I have admired Camille from a distance for so many years. She always appears so graceful and never allowed the Hollywood lifestyle to dictate who she was, even in her youthful years when Bill was in his prime. I am sure it must have been difficult at times. She chose to discontinue coloring her hair and showcased the premature grey many years ago when it was not popular for a young Hollywood couple. Instead of being caught up in the glamour, she devoted her efforts to raising her family and giving millions to education and philanthropy as a way of sharing her blessings. As a result, the Cosby gifts have benefited many.

Mrs. Cosby’s humanitarian acts along should give her peace, but how can she be at peace when allegations against her husband threatens to destroy a lifetime of work. It’s despairing to think her good deeds may be tarnished by actions not of her own doing.

I am disturbed about the numerous allegations against Bill Cosby. I absolutely believe there was infidelity in their marriage. Something Camille appears to have forgiven years ago. My prayers are the truth is revealed by the accused and the accusers, because the truth will set them all free.

I can’t suggest to Mrs. Cosby how to feel or what to say about her husband. After all, she has been with him for 50 years and the accusers allegedly only a brief time. I can agree with the statement Bill Cosby said to a reporter about Camille, “Love and the strength of womanhood.  Let me say it again, love and the strength of womanhood. And, you could reverse it, the strength of womanhood and love.”

If I Could Have, Would Have, Should Have

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There are many variations of this title. The late jazz and R&B singer Lou Rawls used lyrics in his popular song with the title, “If I Coulda, Woulda, Shoulda” The guest evangelist speaking at a church service titled her sermon, “When I Could, I Wouldn’t; now I Want to and I Can’t.” Anyway you say it; the intent is to suggest regrets.

If you are reading this article and have never spoken these words or something similar, you can stop reading now. You are perfect! For the rest of us, there have been times in life, perhaps even now, that you have considered, what if? What if I had continued in school, not had children, married the other person, stayed on my job, took the position in another town, did as the doctor told me………and the list goes on. You can place your own if(s) in the dots and if you are like me, could possible fill most of this page. We all have times when we reflect on the past and believe things would be different if we had taken another direction or made another choice whether personal, family, relationships, careers, or business.

You are absolutely correct; things would be different, but not necessarily for the better. We typically make decisions based on circumstances that dictate our choices. Sometimes we have full knowledge and other times we make decisions based on our emotions. Even decisions made with significant thought, research and educated calculations may not bring us the results we seek. Most significant is the experiences and lessons learned.  If we carefully review are past choices and move forward, we elevate our thought process to a “now focus.”

You may have regrets, but you do not have to remain in that cloud. I understand some choices have been extreme like drug and alcohol addictions, committing crimes, staying in abusive situations or being abusive. However, if you have humbled yourself and submitted to a better life, you have made an incredibly important choice. Regardless of your regret or situation, it is now time to take a living forward position and keep going in that direction no matter what. You Could, if only you Would!

For more on Sheila Agnew visit her on the web at http://www.sheilaagnew.com

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Spread the Love!

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I was pondering the emotion of love and wandered how love can be the most powerful force in the universe and yet, many have such a difficult time understanding, embracing and expressing the one emotion that is designed to hold us together.

The bible teaches us to abide by faith, hope and love, but the greatest of these is love.  We are further asked to pursue love and commanded that we love one another as God has loved us.  This is a testimony to the power of love.

Often when we think of love, particularly during the month of February for Valentine’s Day, we think of relationships between husband and wife or boyfriend and girlfriend.  Our feelings seem to intensify with the very thought that we are loved by that special person.  Some people spend days, weeks and months trying to create a clever way to show and tell their sweethearts how they are loved.  That expression is typically done through a nice dinner, flowers, candy or cards.  These are all beautiful gestures that I appreciate giving and receiving, but I cannot help but consider if we spread the intensity of that love beyond our mates, how powerful our relationships would be within our families, friends and communities.

Do you know someone that has lost a mate or loved one recently? What about an elderly parent, relative or even a total stranger in a nursing home? Do you know a homeless family or even a youth in your neighborhood that would benefit from just a little dose of a love expression?  Imagine if we reached beyond our personal desires to receive and consider giving more love on Valentine’s Day.  That’s the power of real love, loving one another.

The power of love lies within each and every one of us. On Valentine's Day, strength your arms beyond your sweetheart and show a gesture of love to others.  We all like to hear those three words, I Love You.

The Power of Love

     I was pondering the emotion of love and wondered how love can be the most powerful force in the universe and yet, many have such a difficult time understanding and expressing the one power that is designed to hold us together. 

     The bible teaches us to abide by faith, hope and love, but the greatest of these is love.  We are further instructed to pursue love and commanded that we love one another as God has loved us.  This is a testimony to the power of love.

 Often when we think of love, particularly during the month of February for Valentine's Day, we think of relationships between husband and wife or boyfriend and girlfriend.  Our feelings seem to intensify with the very thought that we are loved by that special person.  Some people spend days, weeks and months trying to create a clever way to show their sweethearts they are loved.  That expression is typically done through a nice dinner, flowers, candy or cards.  These are all beautiful gestures that I appreciate giving and receiving, but I cannot help but consider if we spread the intensity of that love beyond our mates, how powerful our relationships would be within our families and communities.

    The power of love helps us to overcome and endure through bad relationships, loss and dysfunctional situations.  That bond created by love most certainly has the power to hold families together.  Love provides the equipment to help us go the distance.  Love covers our mistakes.  Love allows us to hold on to each other in spite of our differences.  Love empowers us to reach our arms across a wider range of people and situations to lift others up. 

     The power of love lies within each and every one of us.  On this Valentine's Day, stretch your arms beyond your sweetheart and show a gesture of love to others. We all enjoy hearing those three words, I Love You.